Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Always 'Switched On'!

So, my mum called me at 8.20am Australian time today. After she'd asked about how i was faring, her next question was "So, what are you thinking of now? Because i know you are thinking!!'. You see, there's this phrase my mum always uses to describe our connection: 'Blood is thicker than water!'. What it basically means is that no matter the distance between both of us, we always manage to know how the other person is feeling and call at the appropriate time. She always knows when i'm down without me having to text or even call and the same goes for how i can judge what's going on in her life. Since i've been up at 6am this morning, my brain has been processing stuff like a 24-hour internet download. I was meant to be studying for the two tests i had today but it's so bloody difficult to concentrate when there's lots of things going through my mind. Even as i type this, i've got several things going through my mind and it's best you're not aware of this. It's one of the things that makes me feel like i'm going crazy! I always find it very difficult to quiet the thoughts running through my mind. The worst part is that when i actually try to write them down in a bid to quiet my thoughts, my hand is in a competition with my mind on who can move faster than the other. Usually, it's my mind that wins because i'm always rushing to write down my thought before the next one pops up. That's one of the reasons i'm not really consistent with writing in my journal anymore because by the time i'm done with one thought, another has popped into my head and then another. Infact, i have a headache as i'm writing this....even my eyes are trying to graze over the words in a bid to stay on track because lots of things are happening up there...

The funny thing is that this usually happens at any given time of the day. I could be sat next to a friend and my brain goes on autodrive; i can even be having a conversation with them whilst it's going on up there. The worst is when i'm sleeping or in the shower. My mum once got really freaked out when i was about 12 or 13. I'd just come home for the holidays from boarding school and i decided to sleep in her room because my aunt had taken over mine. All of a sudden, i started sleep talking. But the strange thing for her was that i wasn't talking jargon; it was a logical chain of thought and i was having a sort of three-way conversation with my mind over something that was going on in our family at the time. I was basically arguing with the point of view that the entire family and everyone else who felt our business was theirs wanted us to go with. Of course, my mum freaked out and ended up recording my entire conversation on my own tape recorder. She listened to it over and over again and then cried her eyes out. Of course, when i woke up, she told me everything that happened and played the tape back just to prove it to me. You know what she said? 'You're not just your father's daughter; you are your father in female form!!!' That's a very serious thing to say considering how stubborn and opinionated my father can get; which is probably why we don't argue like regular parents and children do. Our arguements always tend to go in the form of politics, bargaining and negotiations but without the shouting or the insults. Of course, after the whole tape incident she always asks me for my opinion because 9 times out of 10, it's the opinion that's going to break the family rule.

So now that i have come to the end of this post - i have to run and get the bus to uni - i would like to know how to quiet my thoughts once in a while. Because during my test at 11am this morning, i was actually thinking about a phrase i'd read earlier in my management textbook made by one of the founders of Southwest Airlines, USA.
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